Lillian B. Rubin Ph.D.
Artist & Writer
January 13, 1924 – June 17, 2014
What does one post on the website of a dearly beloved mother?
How to make meaning out of deep sadness for those who never met Lil but know & appreciate her work…
for those who just happen by Lil’s website in a search for meaning about relationships, aging, race & class in America…
for those Lil touched during an amazing life and to whom Lil meant so much…
Maybe that’s an impossible task. So I will simply leave a daughter’s words for an amazing mother.
You were beautiful at 19 and at 90. You gave me strength, courage & love. Being your daughter wasn’t always easy, but what a fantastic journey these 65 years have been.
I cry knowing we’ll never talk & laugh together again. Then I laugh about the silly stuff you & I shared & all your funny loving quirks. Then I read just one more email from yet another person whose life you touched deeply, about why you were important, about how deeply you were loved & about your pride & joy in me – and I reach for the telephone to share the wonderful words with you. At those moments, reality sets in. And while I’ll never again be able to share the love & the pain, the triumphs & defeats, the joys & sorrow with you on this earth, I know you hear me.
As we all mourn in our various ways, we take comfort knowing you died as you wanted – in your home, in your bed, with dignity, living independently until the end. It’s now our challenge to celebrate your life by living our own with the courage, tenacity & principles with which you lived yours.
With great love I say goodbye from this world to the best mom & my best friend…
June 23, 2014